Are You Responsible For Making Alcoholic Children?

Who are these alcoholic children:   They are quite simply put, you and me.  Every person on this planet is somebody’s child and needs to be protected from the bad things in life wherever possible.  Children will always find themselves trying drugs and drinking alcohol, as long as these things are in our homes and in our society for them to experiment with. We as adults need to break the vicious cycle of alcoholism in our individual families and stop being the source of a ready supply of alcoholic beverages and a beacon to this type of survival. The government will not help you in this one, because they are the suppliers and the  profiteers of your drinking and although they claim differently they are hoping that your children will follow in your foot steps and take up the drinking of alcohol. It will be a difficult thing to admit, but your children’s drinking habit will come out of yours and your inability to admit that you even have a drinking problem in the 1st place.

My 1st memories of  people drinking alcohol were: I would love to say that I learned to drink from one of my friends, but that would be a lie and what would be the point of this conversation if I was not willing to tell the truth. We had 2 tables in our kitchen one for the adults and another in the corner for the youngest of the children, but this is where I learned to want to be an adult so I could drink tea after supper and join in on the adult conversation. It was at the dining room table that I watched adults drinking glasses of port and sherry and having so much fun that I could not wait for my chance to be there with them laughing, singing and drinking.

My 1st drink:  At 12 years old I was finally offered a glass of wine at the dining room table for Christmas and I loved everything about it; the smell, the taste, but most of all it signaled that I was a young man now and my time of being treated as a child was coming to an end. I chose port and I sipped and savored every drop taking my time and trying to make it last because I knew that I would not be offered another. That night at that table was my first drink and it was not with my friends in hiding, or in secret.

My 1st  non drinking enjoyable memory of alcohol:  My 1st memory of liking alcohol, that had come much earlier did not even require me to take a drink. My mother would go out almost every Saturday evening and return in the early morning hours of Sunday. Mom would be slightly tipsy and would come into my room  sit at the end of my bed and tell me how much she loved me,  how I was special and how I needed to help her and always look out for my brother and sister. Although my brother slept in the same room just 4 feet away my mother never woke him up to talk. Mom would always bring me a 1/2 of  a smoked meat sandwich to eat while she talked and I grew to love her visits, but what I loved the most was the smell of the  whiskey and the smell of her perfume all mixed together. To this day I love that smell although I no longer drink. 

My 1st drunk: There was not one special occasion in my house that did not see alcohol being consumed. I remember an uncle dying and his wife having the temerity to not have any alcohol to serve our family and his friends after the funeral. My mother and aunt sent for alcohol and demanded that it be served and told my uncle’s wife if she had needed help getting alcohol to serve that she should have asked them, but not to serve his friends a drink was ill-mannered. His wife explained that they as a family had given up drinking years ago and saw no need to have alcohol and they did have tea, coffee, soft drinks and juice. Alcohol was served and my uncles wake went on as wakes have always gone on in my family before his funeral and after it, with people drinking, laughing and the retelling of old memories, with enough noise to wake up the dead. 

By the time my cousin got married I was 15 and although no one said it I was unofficially allowed to drink a drink or two. My uncle was on the bar and he poured me my 1st rye and ginger ale and my 2nd, 3rd and 4th, there may have been a 5th, but all I remember was sitting in a room crying uncontrollably and whining that I did not my cousin to move away from home; I was now drunk for the 1st time in my life and it was not an outsider that had given me the alcohol and I was not in some night club that was serving drinks to minors I was home and my uncle was the bartender.

Alcohol as a social tool: Everyone thought that it was either cute or funny and that is part of the problem, it was acceptable and it was not only acceptable in my house.  Until drinking manifest itself as a tangible problem, ie. bad marks, acting out, getting into trouble with the law, most parents do not see the harm in a little social drinking and it fact encourage its use because one day it will be a required skill in negotiations, their job and in fitting in on the social circuit. Children will be taught the art of drinking without the parents even knowing that they could be grooming their child for little else then a life of an alcoholic.  

 Arguments, greetings all started and ended with some one offering another person an alcoholic beverage and no one seemed to notice that we the children were right there looking and learning how to handle adult problems in an adult way. Is it really all that surprising that when things start to go crazy good like rags to riches, or crazy bad like raped or constantly beaten, that the 1st thing that a kid runs for is alcohol to ease the stress? I do not think so, this is what the child has been taught to do. I believe that there is no such creature as the social drinker. Alcohol is a tool used to disarm, soften or weaken resistance. It is used to gain an advantage, or give false courage to the user. there in my opinion is no positive use for it to be drunken by humans, so as a recovering  alcoholic I ask what is the point to keeping it around?

Alcoholism passed from one generation to the next:  Most people would say no, but I say it is. There are so many types of alcoholics and most people deny being any of them, although most people drink every day of their adult lives for one reason, or another. I think we learn it by example from our family and it is reinforced with the interaction between our friendships and our need to feel secure.  I think alcohol is the adult pacifier and the true test of dependency on it is when the alcohol like the pacifier is taken away.  I believe that most people depend on it or do not drink at all. I would hazard that most people walk the line between functioning alcoholism and the weekend form of alcoholism, but alcoholics they are non the less in my opinion and most end up falling off at some point in their lives, or end up passing on their form of alcoholism tho their children as it was done in my family.

Canadian Government and alcoholism: The Canadian government is one of the main reason why so many of us end up alcoholics in the 1st place. They have a vested interest in us drinking, smoking, and gambling. Despite their advertising campaigns warning of the dangers of doing all three things they make much tax dollars from us doing all three. Quebec has gone one better and owns the casino and the lotteries and is the only operator of legalised gambling in the province. The province of Quebec also owns and operates all of the liquor stores in the province, so they must share in the responsibility of turning out a population brought up to be functioning alcoholics, or worse.  How hypocritical this is on the side of the government to put out ads on tv, radio and news papers warning the population of the dangers of abusing these products while they maintain a vested interest in making them attractive and appealing to us at the same time so that they, the government can enjoy the profits that our losses give to them.

Solution to alcoholism in children:  Stop allowing people to drink. There is no benefit to people drinking except from the profits generated by big business and government off of an illness.  If the alcohol is removed from the stores and made illegal then the chances of children becoming alcoholic will be virtually non-existent. Unfortunately this would take a bunch of functioning alcoholics in the government to give up their pacifiers and I am not quite sure they are ready to do that. If you are thinking gee he did not include the parents in the solution well they only buy what is available for them to buy; no liquor stores less chance of getting the booze and giving it to their children. I think the solution rests in the government of Canada deciding what is good money and what is bad.  Drinking alcohol is a bad habit, alcoholism is a very bad disease and if not detected and treated early, alcoholism leads to serious complications and often death. If the government will not do what the right thing, then it is up to you to do what is right for your children and do not encourage them to drink and if you can manage it do not drink in front of them, or give them alcohol.

I had to pick up my granddaughter at a club drunk jut the other night.  Told her mother she was going to a sweet 16 birthday party at a friend’s house and went instead to a sweet 16 birthday party that was at a bar. her friend had a bottle and they decided to drink the whole flask of rum straight out of the bottle before going into the club, because they were not allowing any drinking that night because they were hosting a party for minors and were searching pockets and handbags where flasks could be hidden.  They got pretty smashed and Grandpa was dispatched to go get her and bring her home safely. My granddaughter will be punished, but she is only 15 and already she told me that she has drunk on three other occasions. We must keep our eye on our children at all times, Waver , or blink once and you will not know until it is too late that you have a way out of control child on your hands.  Help save a child make drinking  alcohol illegal. 

About archemdis

I try to say what is on my mind and not hurt others, but some things need to be said whether they hurt or not and I do just that. I try to listen as well as talk, but my opinion is just that mine. You need not take it as your own, just respect the fact that I am entitled to it, as you are yours. I do read all comments, but will only answer, or allow to be displayed those which adress me by name, refer to the post by name in the comment, or that have been sent through the proper channels. In this manner I can tell whether the comment was meant for me and that it is not just spam.
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