I like to write on the net because people are free to tune me in or out so the only person I become a boor to is myself. I think that all politicians are liars and have their own agendas and when it gets to the point that it is even more offensive to me than normal I will speak about it in my blog.
I was born in Atlantic City, New Jersey , but spent most of my life in Montreal. Montreal as a city was never perfect, but it used to be alive where now it is dead. People from all over the world loved to come to Quebec. Its’ people were kind polite, warm and helpful. Today they are forced to take a side in our civil war and can not negotiate our city if they do not speak french.
I liked our old city and province which had the flavor of the international, the fun-loving, the trend setting and the cultural diverse society. A place to feel safe and welcomed when visiting. A place where you could count on getting help with a smile no matter where you were coming from, or what language you spoke, or what you happen to be wearing. This is who I am, “Archemdis a proud Canadian, a concerned passionate Quebecer and a lover of Montreal. I long for our city’s glorious past and I speak my mind.
I would like to be read, but in my mind I need to say it more. To this end I will write what I feel needs to be said in the way I feel I need to say it and leave it up to you if you read it or not.
A Little About Me: I was abused for most of my young life in one form, or another by just about every trusted person a child should be able to run to for help and in the end I became one of the most feared crime personalities in the streets at the time and nobody even knew my name. I was a pimp, a drug dealer and a gangster, but the worst part was I was an angry child doing adult things and trying to get even with those who had hurt me. I was trying punish adults, the police the courts, the government, in fact a whole of society, for the hurt, the pain and the shame that my life had become as a result of living in a world that just did not care about the children it created, until it was time to lock them up and abuse them some more.
I was verbally, mentally and physically abused at home and at school, because this was the way children were taught in my generation to mind their betters. It was legal and it was sanctioned by the police, the courts and the government. I was sexually taunted by both a female teacher and by my mother’s friends since grade 3 and sexually assaulted by a community center male councilor when I was 12, closer to 13. I was living on my own on the streets before my 16 birthday and was an alcoholic, drug addict and a walking talking danger to society before my 18th birthday. I spent countless wasted days months and years in every juvenile detention center in Quebec and learned all I needed to know to become the best gangster in the city and there were thousands of us young boys and girls all finishing and honing our skills. The skills it would take to stay alive and do what was necessary to have a successful life in crime, I graduated top of my class.
I have tried every drug with the exception of putting a needle in my arm and only missed that because thank the good Lord I was afraid of needles. I have committed every crime you can imagine and maybe some you can’t with the exception of violating children sexually. They seemed to be my only link to purity, my sanity, my life before the madness came; the one line I would not cross, my weakest link, my achiles heel. If you look hard today nothing has changed for children it has just gone under ground, making the abuse harder to spot and easier to pass over.
I grew into an even angrier man and it was all directed at a society that I could not reach and so I took it out on the people from your world that liked to live on the edge of mine. The want to be gangsters, the pretenders, the people who were trying to be like me, when all I wanted to do was be like them. I had my 1st daughter when I was 19 years old and my 2nd ten years later. I struggled with being a good father, because I did not have the tools, but they were my heart and soul and some how through everything that was going on they kept pulling me back to them; to love and to the way life was supposed to be.
One day an old friend in the moving business called me and offered me a way off of the streets ,working moving furniture and I took it. I was 29 years old, suicidal and needing to be a good father. A father that my girls could count on and I wanted the hurting to stop. Not just the hurting that society had inflicted on me but the hurting I had been inflicting on society ever since my first slap, and I said yes to the job. It was the yes that allowed me to begin my change and finally realise the dream and desire of every child growing up; the dream of feeling safe and secure, useful and loved. I had finally found the road to peace through the love of my daughters and an old friend. I am now a productive member of society with 4 lovely grandchildren. I am now the worst enemy an abuser of other people can have, whether they be the police, the courts, the government and even society, because I have a new weapon called the pen and it is mightier than the sword and I am not afraid to use it.
I try to say what is on my mind and not hurt others, but some things need to be said whether they hurt or not and I do just that. I try to listen as well as talk, but my opinion is just that mine. You need not take it as your own, just respect the fact that I am entitled to it, as you are yours.
I like to remember this when I think not to participate in life, because I feel that I alone can not make a change in how things work out, ” One drop of water by itself is just a drop of water that can soon be dried up and made to disappear, but millions of drops can form a raging river not so easily dried up, or and ocean not easily crossed, but it all starts with one drop of water.”
God Bless and keep you all and keep you well. Like the singer said, “if you get the chance to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.”
Quebec Is Dealing With Its Priorities As It Sees Them In 2011 (archemdis.wordpress.com)